By all accounts, Sunday’s Oscars ceremony wasn’t so bad. It zipped along with relative briskness, it had plenty of memorable moments and – in Parasite – had a record-breaking, genuinely uplifting story. But that doesn’t matter, because nobody watched. The 2020 Oscars will go down as the least-watched ceremony ever, with ABC’s broadcast gaining just 23.6 million viewers in the US, down 6 million from last year. And this isn’t a blip. In 2015, the Oscars were watched by 37 million people. In 2010 they were watched by 41 million. A decade from now, hardly anyone will watch the Oscars at all. Clearly, something needs to be done. But what? Thanks for asking. Allow me to present a clear four-point strategy to making the Oscars great again. 1 Beat the bloat This year’s ceremony, though leaner than previous editions, was still punishingly long thanks to some truly baffling choices by producers. Winners were announced by presenters who, since there was no host, were introduced by other people. The best animated feature segment went as follows: Beanie Feldstein walked on stage, introduced herself, then introduced Mindy Kaling, who introduced herself, then read the nominees, then announced the winner, presented the trophy and stepped back while the winners introduced themselves. And that was before a pre-presenter decided to rap a recap of the entire Oscars ceremony up until that point. Also, Eminem’s (unnecessary) performance of a 17-year-old song was preceded by a long (and unnecessary) montage of films with songs in them, which was preceded by Lin-Manuel Miranda (unnecessarily) explaining that some films have songs in them. Then there were the long montages of all the best picture nominees. Get rid of the montages, the Eminem song and the pre-presenters and you’d chop half an hour off the ceremony. More people would watch the show if it wasn’t so exhaustingly long. 2 Award popular films It was great that Parasite swept the board and made history. It was the best film nominated, and its win means that millions of people might be turned on to non-English-language films. However, the Oscars always get a ratings boost when a box-office hit is in the running. When the third Lord of the Rings film won 11 Oscars in 2004, for instance, it was the most-watched ceremony in half a decade. But the Academy was laughed out of town when it planned a best popular-film category. Besides, the Top 10 films from last year included three Marvel films, two Disney cartoons, two Disney remakes, a DC film, a Star Wars film and a sequel to a Jumanji reboot. None of them are the best films of the year. I suspect the solution might be Netflix. Perhaps if more nominated films appeared on Netflix, people will feel invested in their Oscar chances again. Far more people saw, say, Marriage Story than they would have if it had been traditionally released only in cinemas. But it was available on Netflix, and for a few weeks it was all anyone could talk about. This is the biggest issue. The Oscars are the culmination of awards season. There are simply too many awards ceremonies, all giving gongs to the same people. On Sunday, Brad Pitt, Laura Dern, Joaquin Phoenix and Renée Zellweger won in categories that they’d previously won at the Baftas, the Golden Globes and the SAG awards. By the time the Academy Awards rolled around most of the winners were locked in. Asking people to sit through hours of suspense-less television is a lot. The Oscars can’t destroy the other awards shows, so perhaps the solution is to move it earlier. Let’s have it in the middle of December, before the Golden Globes. 4 Stream it, don’t televise it Move with the times. Stream the Oscars online, and then let fanatics hack up the footage into YouTube clips – that’s how most people seem to prefer to consume it. Then, you can watch the ceremony in bite-sized chunks after a decent night’s sleep. 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