o, you are in the UK and want to watch the US election results? Even after what happened in 2016 – and even though the election wasn’t called for Donald Trump until 7.30am GMT – you really want to put yourself through all that again? Well, fine. I cannot condone this sort of behaviour, but I can, begrudgingly, guide you through your viewing options. BBC One: US Election 2020 11.30pm-1pm Katty Kay and Andrew Neil – in his last gig for the broadcaster – will present rolling coverage, from Washington and London respectively, starting half an hour before the first presidential polls close. Jon Sopel and Clive Myrie will be with the Trump and Biden campaigns, while Nick Bryant, Emily Maitlis and others will report from various battleground states. Experts will be shepherded in for analysis and Christian Fraser will have a big screen to play with. Kay and Neil’s heroic – and potentially traumatising – shift will conclude at 9am. At this point, Matthew Amroliwala and Reeta Chakrabarti will begin four further hours of reaction and analysis. Hopefully, by the time this is over, we will know who won. Even if we don’t, BBC One is scheduled to return to normal. Sure, the election is important, but not important enough to derail Doctors. ITV: Trump Vs Biden: The Results 11pm-6am As with all elections, ITV’s coverage will be less watched than the BBC’s, but fitfully more interesting. The good news is that Tom Bradby is holding the fort, so we might witness another of his planet-sized, shoulder-slumping sighs when he finally knocks off. However, official coverage ends at 6am, so there is an almighty chance that the result will be revealed on Good Morning Britain, provided that Piers Morgan can be quiet for long enough. Sky News: America Decides 9pm-7am Sky’s election output kicks off at 9pm with an hour-long programme entitled Trump: America Interrupted, which will look at the impact of the Trump presidency. After that, results coverage begins at 10pm – four hours before many polls close – with America Decides, which Dermot Murnaghan will present live from Washington. Apparently, Sky will use its most comprehensive election data yet and will work closely with NBC News. It will also include an augmented reality “Race to the White House”, whatever that means. Either way, Kay Burley will take over at 7am. CNN: Election Night in America 5am-9pm Thursday For those of you who hate sleep, CNN’s rolling coverage has already begun and will continue unbroken until The Lead with Jake Tapper begins 64 hours later. Why has such a vast amount of time been devoted to election coverage? It is almost as if CNN knows that the result will be contested and that the contest will rattle on unsatisfactorily for days. Other options As you would expect, your best bet of thorough election coverage would be to follow the Guardian’s election liveblog. But there are other options for the more news-averse. At 10pm, Comedy Central is showing the vastly underrated Die Hard knock-off White House Down. And, given his bracing, shellshocked reaction four years ago, you would be foolish to miss Stephen Colbert’s Showtime election show; it won’t be shown live on UK TV, but it will be all over YouTube after it airs. Then again, you could just go to bed as normal and avoid the whole sorry mess.