started wearing a male chastity device out of curiosity, after reading about other people’s experiences online. I was single, lived on my own and worked from home, so thought: why not place an order by post? Although they come in a multitude of sizes, colours and materials, all are designed to prevent the wearer from getting an erection. They generally consist of three pieces: a ring that sits behind the testicles; a cage that fits tightly around the flaccid penis; and a lock to hold the two other components together. I began wearing the device all day, and found that the inability to get an erection gave me room to focus on other things. Rather than feeling sexually repressed, I felt a kind of freedom. I could concentrate more on work and I felt more in touch with the world in general. I have since met a loving partner who, to my delight, enjoys the idea of “locking her man up”. Wearing it during sex has made me a more attentive lover. So far we have a fairly amateur approach; I’m in chastity for a few hours at most, whereas some people remain locked away for weeks or even months. But we recently purchased a more lightweight device that I can wear to go out, without the telltale bulge. This has added an extra layer of excitement to our relationship. • Each week, a reader tells us about their sex life. Want to share yours? Email sex@theguardian.com. All submissions are published anonymously, and subject to our terms and conditions.