Vitality Stadium/Dean Court, Bournemouth Even the billionaire riches of American businessman Bill Foley have not changed the modest car park to the rear of the corrugated iron – and temporary – South Stand, erected in 2013. Until then, the ground was three-sided, à la Oxford United’s Kassam Stadium. Premier League premiums do not apply here: fans pay just £1 for the privilege of parking directly behind the stand named after the former Bournemouth and Manchester United striker Ted MacDougall. Away supporters’ coaches pull into the car park, also used by television outside-broadcast trucks, to drop off fans a couple of hours before kick-off. A typically warm Dorset welcome is guaranteed. Madejski Stadium/Select Car Leasing Stadium, Reading Fans stump up £230 for a season ticket in the Red Car Park, barely a couple of minutes’ walk from the ground. A soulless stadium, but a brilliant, no-nonsense arrangement. In truth, it is a treat for the car-park aficionado. At the end of Biscuit Way (I know) is an endless haven of concrete bays in which to apply the handbrake. Supporters could be forgiven for not being quite so hot on the set-up, given the queues in the immediate aftermath of a game, but for anyone hanging around afterwards, a brisk departure is par for the course. Adams Park Stadium, Wycombe Wanderers At the end of the Sands Industrial Estate, this grey matter is nestled on the edge of the Chiltern Hills. The two-tier car park (the lower tier is boxed off for players, officials, hospitality and disabled guests) developed a notorious reputation after Wycombe were ridiculed online for confirming it had sold out against Sunderland last year. “The maximum capacity is 350 in good weather, reduced to 150 in poor conditions,” says the club website. Liberty Stadium, Swansea City, SA1 2JT If one cannot nab a spot in the stadium grounds themselves, then getting a space opposite the Landore Park and Ride, a few minutes’ walk down the road, is the next best thing. Better still, Phil, a cheery steward, guarantees a warm Welsh reception on arrival at the media entrance. Not quite the “muck and nettles” of the Championship that Neil Warnock speaks about in glowing terms, but rather a mix of gravel, the odd puddle and grass. Huish Park, Yeovil Town There is something soothing about a trip to Somerset, even though Yeovil do possess, let’s face it, a piddly stadium. While the club is now non-league, in the past big matches – Manchester United visited in the FA Cup in 2015 and 2018 – have meant parking on the grass verge behind the basic, uncovered terrace that houses the away fans. The Garden of Remembrance at the other end, where there are tributes to former striker Adam Stansfield, who died of cancer aged 31, and former captain Lee Collins, who took his own life in 2021, is a nice touch. A Transcript of the Original Classic Anecdote: The Gate That Wasn’t Locked in the Night-Time Newport v Brighton, 10 January 2021: I’d parked in the primary school where the Newport players and staff park. That’s where you can park on a match day at the moment. As I left the ground at about half past eleven last night, I was very worried that they might have locked it up, so I hotfooted it around the perimeter of Rodney Parade and sprinted to get there, with all the grace of Dan Burn, and eventually got there, and it was open. So I was very happy. I could get home safely, and here I am now. I lived to tell the tale. I worked up a sweat. I was thinking: “How can I get home?” All these things were rushing through my head.