Readers reply: is it true that British people get nicer the farther north you go?

  • 7/21/2024
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Readers reply Depends on your definition of nice. If you want to chat with strangers in a cafe or at a bus stop, your chances are directly proportional to the distance from London. If you want privacy and toleration of difference, London is pretty good for that. The rudest anyone has ever been to me was a bus driver in Devon, but perhaps it had been a long summer. Cardinocrinum When my daughter, who lives in London, came to visit us for the first time in Pitlochry, she came back from her morning run saying: “People are strange here.” When we quizzed her on this, she said that, as she had passed people, they had all said: “Good morning,” something that would not have happened in London. I am not sure that this is only a north versus south thing; I suspect it may also be down to community size. epeeist I suspect it has a lot to do with how many people you expect to meet. Saying: “Good morning,” to everyone you meet in a city in rush hour wouldn’t be feasible. HilaryAJ Ridiculous question. There are nice and nasty people all across the UK. snowybeach A northerner wouldn’t get cranky like that. NonDairyCanary I grew up in Yorkshire, but had a southern accent from my parents, who came from London. I was not made to feel welcome at all. I was physically attacked on more than one occasion. I was regularly called a “snob” because of my accent, even though it wasn’t me with a huge chip on my shoulder. So, no, people are not more friendly the farther north you go. Maybe they are nicer to people they see as northerners. Matt1086 I’m really tired of this rubbish. I’m from the south coast, moved up to Manchester to marry a man from the opposite end of the country in my 20s and stayed there for 20 years. Whenever we came down south to visit, I’d nudge him every time a stranger was friendly on the street or in a shop – that was a lot of nudges. Back in Manchester, I often felt the need to hide my accent in public. When, with groups of friends, there would be the familiar mocking of “unfriendly southern softies”, I’d have to remind them that I was right there! Usually, in these conversations, it would turn out that they had only ever been to London and didn’t know anywhere else south of Watford Gap. I had to point out that London was not representative of the south and a lot of people living or working there weren’t actually from London. Also, what type of “friendliness” do you want – the American kind, surface-deep, or true kindness? Ali No, it isn’t. We lived in Teesdale for a year and have never lived in such an unfriendly place, despite me having grown up in North Yorkshire and my partner’s family being from Jesmond in Newcastle. His uncle remarked: “What do you expect? They are Dales people.” In contrast, I have just returned to live in Canterbury, after many years abroad, and people have been unfailingly kind, helpful and welcoming. P Rowe I wouldn’t say nicer, per se. Friendlier, however? Yes. There’s just a sense of community and sharing that seems to translate to being friendly and helpful to visitors. People are far more likely to say hello to you in Newcastle, Glasgow or Liverpool than in London. KateJRR As an American who lived and worked in Buckinghamshire and North Yorkshire, and travelled all over the UK for work between 1993 and 2005, I definitely found that the British people I encountered seemed to get friendlier the farther north I got. My colleagues and neighbours were all lovely, but the folks in North Yorkshire and Scotland seemed more open and consistent in their welcome and friendship. They were quick to invite me to family events, or the pub, and to help out in a pinch. My neighbours were my friends out of work. We had a lot of fun and supported each other in difficult times, too. I always thought the UK was the opposite of the US in that regard. Here, it seems that folks in the south are considered more friendly. Susan Douglas I’ve just completed a 50k run in Wiltshire (day two of Race to the Stones). There was some lovely and friendly support along the route. While chatting to fellow runners on the shuttle bus back to base camp, this very subject came up. Both the southerners I was talking with agreed that people in the north are friendly than in the south. I find it particularly noticeable when out running. In the north, strangers in parks and on canal towpaths usually smile, offer thanks, apologise or say hello when passing, but when I’ve run in the south this isn’t the norm (albeit I’ve a small sample size). I’m obliged to wonder at what point in the north/south divide on this cultural divide takes place. While I firmly believe the north begins along a rough line from the Mersey to the Humber (bending south briefly to take in Sheffield), I’d say the Midlanders, north of Birmingham, are similarly friendly, and the people of the Peak District tend to be lovely, always stopping for pleasantries or chatting while hiking or in pubs. Septimus Turner No, not particularly. I was born in Derbyshire and live in Surrey, and people here have been really friendly and welcoming. It’s a myth that people are nicer up north. Up there, there are plenty of snobs who hide behind a facade of friendliness. Laurence My wife and I moved to Derbyshire from West Sussex three years ago after having enjoyed many visits to the area. A major consideration in our decision to relocate was that we found the local folk friendlier, more relaxed, unhurried and welcoming. Since we moved, I have often pondered why life is so different. My conclusion is that housing, be it to buy or rent, is more affordable and that people are therefore less burdened by excessive debt and the related work and sometimes domestic stresses that are so common among people down south. By and large, salaries are no different from those in the south, outside London, but they go further. When we sit and enjoy our wonderful local park in Buxton, we take pleasure in quietly watching the intergenerational family outings and picnics. It’s a common sight and something we seldom saw over many years living in the south. I attribute such quality of family life to people having more time and being generally less financially extended. Chris Boulter In 1968, I visited Manchester and needed to get the train to Liverpool. I asked a woman the way to the train station. She turned from her route and walked me to the next street corner and pointed and explained the way. This instant neighbourliness was new to me and I remember it clearly. David Kipling, British Columbia It’s more a question of urban and rural. On my many cycle trips north and south, I find the people are much the same, but friendlier in rural locations. Carleton When I travelled a lot in England for work, the time between arrival at premises and offer of a hot drink tended to get longer and longer the farther south I went. Stevenage – nil by mouth. Widnes – a call en route to say the kettle was on. It didn’t seem related to how far I’d travelled to get there. The south-of-Watford-Gap drought was mitigated if there was a northerner on staff. (N=1, experiment duration 1998-2016.) EmmaB From personal experience, once you travel north of Watford or west of Reading, people become more open and easier to connect with. I’ve spent 18 years in Hertfordshire and five years on the border of east London and Essex. I see a considerable sense of one-upmanship in the south-east, which I rarely see elsewhere. That’s not to say I didn’t meet a good number of very pleasant people. But it’s certainly easier to strike up a conversation with a stranger outside London and the home counties. I have a very unscientific pub test. In three years living in Essex (Loughton/Woodford) and visiting my closest pub, I was never acknowledged as a regular. In Manchester (my home town), if you visit a pub three times, the staff are conversational and know what you’re going to order. One last observation: in the summer of 2012, London suddenly became one of the friendliest places anyone could visit. I felt proud. TLStAlbans I’m British, I live in arctic Norway and I am very nice. Steven, Bodø Yes. Now piss off. Worst regards, The British Antarctic Survey. boynamedstu

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